I grew up in the analog age. We didn’t have the internet, cell phones, dating apps, Facebook, Instagram, GPS navigation or Twitter. If there is a digital divide between generations, I am definitely an immigrant to the world of technology where my children are natives. I have slowly grown into the new world, only occasionally kicking and screaming.
In reaction to the unwelcome end of my marriage, I took an intrepid dive into the world of online dating three years ago. I can’t say it hasn’t gone well, but there have definitely been some landmines along with minor bumps in the road.
At the risk of sounding like an old lady, I find the phenomenon of dick pictures generally appalling. I am only 55 years old. My niece is 29 and told me that this phenomenon is de riguer among her generation. She told me she has seen hundreds of these, mostly unsolicited from men she connected with online.
I suppose I have been fortunate in that I have only received one unsolicited dick picture.
I went on a date for lunch with a guy I found on Tinder. I know, hook up site and all that. I tried to act like it was a serious dating site. The date was unremarkable. Very tall, good looking guy with not much to talk about. We were in similar situations as far as relationship status that being in a marital separation.
I was being polite and followed up the date with a “thank you for lunch” text when bam I got a picture of his dick in response. I was shocked. I guess it was in part because I was new to dating. When I recovered from the shock, I realized he was just looking to hook up. I told him I didn’t appreciate the picture showing up on my phone which I’m sure sent a clear message about how I felt about him. End of that story.
I can’t help but wonder what men expect to happen when they do this. His dick looked good enough, but it wasn’t exactly what I was looking for at the moment and I’m sure I gave zero indicators that it was on our date. I suppose this may fall under the “if you throw enough shit up against the wall something is bound to stick” theory. Maybe some women run right over to a guy’s place and get naked after they receive a picture of their dick.
I have never tried sending a man a picture of my vagina for fun. Didn’t that just sound so weird? Men and women are clearly wired differently.
This phenomenon has been scientifically studied:
Dr Thaddeus Birchard, a clinical director at the Marylebone Centre for Psychological Therapies, also agrees that men consider their penis as a “symbol of masculinity and power.”
Because of this, “men imagine that it will be attractive to women.” (This also applies to other men). Birchard says: “Sending such a photo is really saying ‘look at me in my prowess.’”
This theory rings true with the accounts provided by some self-confessed dick pic senders.
In an article for The Debrief, one dick pic sender, called Tim, says: “I always looked for people close by home, I think the ultimate goal was to get them so aroused that they would want me to come over and have the hottest night of pure desire and lust we ever had.”
I don’t know, but I don’t see this happening as the result of receiving an unsolicited dick picture. Call me a prude.
Both men and women commonly send nudes of themselves to people they meet online, but women tend to wait until asked.
I will admit to sending nude photos to men I have dated. I have never done so to anyone I only met once. I also asked a man for a picture of his dick once. I was involved in a mature relationship with this man if that doesn’t sound too oxymoronic.
No, I’m not an old lady or a prude. I took a full body photo of my boyfriend naked that happened to include his dick just 2 weeks ago for fun. I just don’t quite get what the point of sending an unsolicited picture of a man’s dick is beyond being a simple bid for sexual attention.